Константа

And if it is unsafe, we will start doubting or in general we will refuse to enter there.Therefore decisionmaking, eventually, is based on our expectations, but not on reality.No wonder that the majority of our expectations or prejudices is formed in the early childhood.We learned to approach difficulties with which got used to deal differentially.Therefore, since very early age, at children the general ideas of that are formed, that can be expected from life; that can be expected from men; that can be expected from women; that can be expected from own opportunities; as it is better to work in this or that situation. Young gooses when around admiration soars, so easily start extending the necks, imitating swans.As a result idea of the child of itself becomes unrealistic.Never it is necessary to encourage the child to an escape from reality, to creation of a fictional image of.However, if the child stumbles, do not reproach him.Even if the school sheet is full of bad notes, tell nothing.And if Billey comes home in tears, having suffered defeat in a fight, do not call him mothers darling. Ah, what happens pleasure from adult children if you only knew, the reader!It is incomparable, it has other taste, with it fade.If the ideal seems unattainable full independence full interrelation only because we, parents, whose first purpose independence of the child, for some reason fight against this independence without being tired Meanwhile Makarenko opened that life on freedom can be taught only life on freedom.He and criminals taught freedom freedom, responsibility responsibility, but not deprivation of that and another. In the fine scheme I conductit goes there is weak point, namely the child.The child disturbs!There will be nothing left to me how to force it to follow me.The power becomes, it seems, prime necessity of education, its indispensable condition.Without the power over the child education according to the scheme I conductit goes is simply impossible: the boy does not give in.But if the power the first valor of the tutor, in what the first valor of the child? Similar shells were known earlier, but inventors, specially studying the movements and games of children, understood that the child cannot be engaged on shells, as the adult: he should move, climb, get from a shell on a shell, from a rope on rings, from rings on a rope short flight of stairs, from a short flight of stairs on a rope.Start studying with threeyearold a song will bore it soon; swing hands as if conduct, and the boy will start swinging hands and will learn a song.He likes to sing, but marching, but without sitting. Be convinced that you speak about your difficulties, without mentioning someones else.Wonder: In what my problem in this situation consists?Concentrate on that you can make to resolve the conflict During the conflicts the majority of us concentrates that others have to do, but not that ourselves can make.As soon as you feel that others do not meet requirements of you and it starts angering you, stop and ask yourself a question: What I can make?One night I held a seminar for the large parental audience numbering about hundred people. If you agree with its offer, tell: Well, this week I and will make.Thanks for the help.Unacceptable offer It can propose such solution which will please you not.In this case react approximately so: I do not want even to try to make it.Perhaps, you have some other offers?If does not follow any other offers, arrive as well as in case of evasion.Punishment choice The child can offer punishment.For example: If I am not tidied up in the room, you can spank me.